Me Vs HMV Part 2

Because the first piece is pretty damn long and I wouldn’t want you to have to wade through it all to get to this rather meagre update that will probably be the end of it all. Not because HMV have owned up to making a mistake of course. No, because presumably they’re fed up of having to spare time making more crap up to email every week.

Dear Mr Smith

Thank you for your email on 13 July.

We have gone to considerable lengths to try to satisfy your complaint,

Yes, they’ve had to force 15 virtual pounds into my account and bother to reply to an email 6 days after I send it.

and we are sorry that you still feel that your complaint has not been resolved.

We have credited your online account with £15 and we hope that you will find something you wish to buy on our website.

Having made this payment, confirmed that we have raised this matter internally (i.e. to try to prevent this type of incident happening again) and also apologised to you,

Apologised for everything but the issue in question

I trust you will appreciate why we need to draw a line under this correspondence.

Because you’ve run out of tenuous excuses and falsehoods? Just a guess.

Yours sincerely

Zxxx Exxx

store customer service advisor

But I’m not going to let them have the last word, even if they’ve decided to put their hands over their ears and shout LALALALALALA I’M NOT LISTENING ANY MORE.

I fully understand why you’re drawing a line under this correspondence. It’s because your company is too craven to actually own up to making a mistake and properly admitting to and apologising for it. You’ve apologised for everything butthe initial error that caused this whole thing.

I apologise for the confusion surrounding your initial enquiry

an apology for the confusion surrounding this issue.

I do hope that you will forgive us for the delay in our response to you.

I would also like to apologise for the lack of response

I would like to offer my sincerest apologies for this  misunderstanding.

We apologise for the confusion.

You’ve continually tried to fob me off like some petty simpleton annoyance with ridiculous, contrary and increasingly desperate excuses that stretch the bounds of believability so far I’m surprised that they haven’t snapped back and hit you in the face. Your correspondence paints your company in the eyes of any reasonable person either as liars or incompetents. You can stuff you bloody hush money, as I have no intention of further dealing with a merchant whose word I cannot at all trust. In fact, I will be going out of my way to inform any and all who will listen of HMV’s contemptible bull-shitting condescension and dishonest approach to business, including an online summary of all the correspondence I’ve had to wade through in the vain hope of getting a proper apology and admission of error from you.

Martin S Smith

Not that I expect any response from that. So I leave you all with this humble plea. Please, all of you, don’t shop with HMV any more. They’re shit. Their customer service is slow and patronising, they seem to have a desperate aversion to the truth and they’re just fucking expensive. By all means wander into their High Street stores and look at things you might want to buy, but go home and order it off a decent merchant, like Amazon or Play.

In short, fuck HMV.